Suchitra Krishnamoorthi Says Children Should Never Be Caught Between Divorced Parents: ‘I’m the Full-Time Mom, He’s the Vacation Dad’

Actor and author Suchitra Krishnamoorthi has shared a candid perspective on life after divorce, saying that while her marriage to filmmaker Shekhar Kapur ended years ago, their shared responsibility as parents never did. Reflecting on their journey of raising daughter Kaveri Kapur, Suchitra stressed that personal differences between parents should never stand in the way of a child’s relationship with either parent.

Speaking during a recent interview, the actress described their parenting roles with characteristic honesty and humour.

“He’s the good cop. I’m the responsible one. I’m the full-time mom, and he’s the vacation dad. Co-parenting comes with a lot of responsibility.”

Co-Parenting Requires Commitment Beyond Marriage

Suchitra explained that successful co-parenting is built on keeping a child’s well-being above personal disagreements. She believes that whenever possible, children should continue receiving love, guidance, and emotional support from both parents, even after a marriage ends.

According to the actress, mothers and fathers each contribute different experiences and perspectives to a child’s upbringing, making both relationships valuable.

She also urged separated couples to avoid allowing resentment to influence parenting decisions.

“If it’s possible to keep things amicable, a child should have the love and support of both parents.”

The actress added that a parent should only be excluded from a child’s life if there are genuine concerns about the child’s safety or well-being.

‘Children Shouldn’t Pay the Price’

Reflecting on custody disputes, Suchitra said she has seen situations where legal battles become driven by personal ego rather than the child’s interests.

She believes children often become the unintended victims when parents allow unresolved conflicts to dictate decisions about access and relationships.

Her message focused on putting children first by creating an environment where they can maintain healthy bonds with both parents whenever circumstances allow.

Speaking Openly About Divorce

Looking back nearly two decades, Suchitra recalled that conversations about divorce were far less common when she and Shekhar Kapur separated.

She said that speaking openly about her experience drew criticism at the time, with some advising her to remain silent to avoid public judgment.

Today, she believes discussions around divorce, mental well-being, and family dynamics have become more open and accepting, allowing people to share their experiences without the same level of social stigma.

Motherhood Changed Her Perspective

Suchitra also reflected on how becoming a mother influenced her parenting style.

Having grown up in a strict household, she said she consciously chose a different approach while raising Kaveri. Rather than being overly restrictive, she preferred encouraging openness and trust.

Sharing a light-hearted family memory, the actress revealed that Kaveri once jokingly pointed out that she rarely refused her requests, saying she needed to learn how to say “no” more often.

The anecdote, Suchitra said, remains one of her favourite reminders of the close relationship they share.

A Journey of Growth and Balance

Suchitra Krishnamoorthi and filmmaker Shekhar Kapur married in 1997 and separated before finalizing their divorce in 2007. Over the years, both have continued to support their daughter while pursuing their individual careers.

Her reflections highlight a broader conversation about modern parenting, emphasizing cooperation, mutual respect, and prioritizing children’s emotional well-being over personal conflicts.

As conversations around co-parenting continue to gain attention, Suchitra’s experience offers an example of how separated parents can work toward providing stability and support for their child despite the end of their marriage.