‘I’m Not a Mother Mother’: Sreeleela on Adopting Three Children at 24 and Redefining Motherhood

Conversations around motherhood are often confined to rigid ideas—biological timelines, conventional family structures, and assumptions about when someone is “ready” to care for a child. But real lives rarely fit neatly into these boxes. Actress Sreeleela’s decision to adopt three children by the age of 24 quietly challenges many of these long-held beliefs.

Speaking candidly about the experience, Sreeleela described the journey as deeply personal and emotionally layered. “I fall short of words and get jittery when I talk about it. But it’s taken care of,” she shared, adding, “I’m not a mother mother because there’s an entirely different story to that.”

Her words reflect a more nuanced understanding of caregiving—one that moves beyond labels and focuses on presence, responsibility, and emotional commitment.

How the Journey Began

Sreeleela revealed that the decision to adopt emerged early in her career, almost organically. During the filming of her 2019 Kannada film Kiss, her director took her to an ashram where children were living and being cared for.

“The kids live there. We speak on the phone, and I keep visiting them there,” she explained. What began as a visit slowly evolved into a long-term emotional bond and responsibility—one she chose to embrace quietly.

For years, she kept this part of her life private. “It was a secret for the longest time,” she said, adding that the institution later encouraged her to speak about it publicly. “I don’t want to be given credit for anything, but I want people to start looking in that direction.”

Choosing Care Over Credit

Unlike many public narratives that celebrate adoption as an act of heroism, Sreeleela’s approach is notably restrained. She does not frame her decision as a sacrifice or a milestone worthy of applause. Instead, she positions it as a responsibility—one that exists regardless of recognition.

Her experience highlights a quieter truth about caregiving: emotional responsibility does not always require daily physical presence, yet it remains central to one’s life. The balance between professional ambition, distance, and emotional attachment is complex, especially when chosen at a young age.

Emotional Challenges Young Adoptive Caregivers Face

According to Sonal Khangarot, licensed rehabilitation counsellor and psychotherapist at The Answer Room, young adoptive caregivers often face emotional challenges that extend beyond parenting itself—particularly within the Indian social context.

“One of the most common struggles is social invalidation,” she explains. “Their caregiving is frequently questioned, compared to biological parenting, or treated as less natural. This can lead to self-doubt, guilt, and the constant pressure to prove competence.”

Family dynamics can further complicate the experience. Deep-rooted beliefs around bloodline, caste, inheritance, and legacy may result in subtle resistance, unsolicited advice, or emotional distance. Even well-meaning relatives may unintentionally undermine boundaries, leaving caregivers feeling unsupported or isolated.

Internally, young caregivers often struggle to balance career aspirations with the desire to remain emotionally present for their children—especially when adoption is viewed as a ‘choice’ rather than a necessity. This tension can create persistent guilt, emotional fatigue, and fear of not doing “enough.”

Preparing Emotionally for Adoption

Experts stress that adoption is not defined by the initial decision alone, but by long-term emotional preparedness. “Prospective caregivers need to understand that attachment takes time,” Khangarot notes. “Children may carry early loss or trauma, and caregiving involves continuous emotional labour.”

Mental preparation includes examining personal expectations, coping mechanisms, and beliefs around family and belonging. Anticipating social reactions—especially within extended families—and building resilience around them is equally important.

“Support systems, self-reflection, and adoption-informed counselling help caregivers stay emotionally available and responsive as the child grows,” she adds.

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Indya Story Perspective

Sreeleela’s story reframes motherhood not as a fixed identity, but as an evolving emotional commitment. By choosing adoption early in life—and speaking about it without spectacle—she draws attention to a form of caregiving rooted in consistency rather than convention.

Her experience invites a broader conversation: that showing up emotionally, choosing responsibility, and creating stability can matter just as much as traditional definitions of family. In doing so, she gently expands how motherhood itself can be understood.